Junks and Toothpaste

just some random pieces of everyday


What I like about my father: He always believes me.


It is often the case that people look down on me, ditch me, or call me shit, when I'm not doing well. As I wrote in the previous post, I have my own pace. I need time. I need rest. I have my own way of doing things. I know I seem to be lazy, or probably I actually am, by everyone's standard.


People only see results. When I passed an exam, when I entered uni, when I was hired at the bank, they praised me, told me they had always known my efforts. 


Now I don't have a proper job, staying at home all the time, my hair dyed pinkish gold. I'm working on what I like, seeking for the next way to move on, looking like a lazy nerd secluding herself at home in people's eyes. Of course they call me shit.


But I know they would say, 'I knew it,' when I make another sort of 'success'. 結果出したときだけ、その人達の基準で「頑張った」ときだけ、すごいねって、えらいねって。ずっと好きなことを好きなようにやってるだけで。呆れられて褒められて。I'm sick of that kind of shit.


My father always trusts me. Even now, when I'm not even making a living by myself, even when I'm just useless for others, he doesn't just judge me. He just believes that what I'm doing now will lead to my own success and happiness. He's always proud of me.


Having that kind of person in life is such an encouraging thing. And that's what I like about my dad. And he's just turned 58 yesterday. Happy belated birthday to him! :P

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